Facebook is an online diary and address book that the world can see forever. While users may think only “friends” can view their postings, some of those friends may not be so friendly and provide a door into the postings and photos. Furthermore, Facebook has stored every page as it was posted since its inception. Even though you think you delete it, all of those embarrassing rants and photos are still available and stored.  Forever (at least up until now).  And subject to subpoena for use in your divorce or custody case.  ADAM attorneys routinely use these incriminating postings in evidentiary hearings.

Clients are however not advised to destroy evidence that already exists. Destroying evidence is not allowed and a party to a case who does so may be subject to court sanctions for “despoilation.” Better not to create the evidence in the first place. 

So, lay off the social media while your case is pending and spend the time directly interacting with other humans.

Posted 2/14/11 – Approved by Lea Ann Sterling

The information presented in this article is for general information only and should not be construed as legal advice.

 Family law is an area of the law that deals with family-related issues and domestic relations, including custody and divorce. These issues can be emotional and traumatic. Choosing your divorce lawyer can be one of the most important things you do. A person’s decisions in divorce and custody actions can have long lasting implications on not only the parties, but for the entire family.

 A family law attorney must be able to couple knowledge with understanding and compassion. A family law attorney must be able to solve problems. Five years after the divorce, you will not be able to remember who “won” or “lost,” but you will remember whether the divorce was too expensive, whether your financial settlement or division was extremely unbalanced, and how your children either suffered or survived after resolution of your case. An attorney who does not work to solve problems before going to court will not be a good family law attorney.

 In Michigan, divorce proceedings follow the statutory requirements as found in the Michigan Compiled Laws. To file for a divorce, at least one of the parties must have lived in Michigan for 180 days or more, and in the county where the case will be filed for at least 10 days.  A Complaint for Divorce is filed with the circuit court of the county where you or your spouse resides. Michigan law allows a divorce to be obtained without a determination of fault.

 If you are served with a divorce complaint, you must file an answer within 21 days (or within 28 days in limited circumstances). If you fail to file an answer within 21 days, you can be defaulted. A default which is not set aside could work to your disadvantage when the court decides custody, parenting time, support, and property settlement issues.

 In Michigan it takes a minimum of 60 days to get divorced. If there are minor children, the waiting period is 180 days. However, this 180-day waiting period may be reduced if “undue hardship” can be proven. However, in no case can the waiting period be shortened to less than 60 days.

 Property Division:

 The division of property in Michigan is not governed by any set rules. The division of property need not be equal, but it must be equitable. Nevertheless, the courts have certain principles of general application. In general, the court will consider the following factors in determining property awards:

a.         duration of the marriage
b.         contributions of the parties to the marital estate
c.         age of the parties
d.         health of the parties
e.         life status of the parties
f.          necessities and circumstances of the parties
g.         earning abilities of the parties
h.         past relations and conduct of the parties (e.g. fault); and
i.          general principles of equity

As the above factors indicate, fault in causing the breakdown of the marriage is still a consideration in the division of property. This is true notwithstanding the fact that Michigan is a no fault divorce state. Fault can include things like sexual infidelity, domestic violence, substance dependency/alcoholism, and gambling addiction. 

Spousal Support:

What was formerly referred to as alimony is now called spousal support. In determining if a party should be awarded spousal support, the court will take into account the following factors:

a.         The past relations and conduct of the parties
b.         The length of the marriage
c.         The ability of the parties to work
d.         The source of and amount of property awarded to the parties
e.         The age of the parties
f.          The ability of the parties to pay alimony
g.         The present situation of the parties
h.         The needs of the parties
i.          The health of the parties
j.          The prior standard of living of the parties and whether either is responsible for the support of others
k.         General principles of equity

 Fault in causing the breakdown of the marriage can also be a factor in awarding spousal support. In certain rare cases, spousal support can be awarded on a permanent basis.

 Child Custody:

 Custody is one of the most emotional and traumatic issues in any family court case. The “Child Custody Act” sets forth eleven factors that a judge must consider when making a custody decision. In determining which parent should have custody of the minor children, the court will determine what is in the “best interests of the child.” The court will look to the following factors in making a decision as to what is in a child’s best interests:

 a.         The love, affection, and other emotional ties existing between the parties involved and the child.

 b.         The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to give the child love, affection, and guidance and continuation of the educating and raising of  the child in its religion or creed, if any.

 c.         The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with food, clothing, medical care or other remedial care recognized and permitted under the laws of this state in place of medical care, and other            material needs.

 d.         The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory environment, and the desirability of maintaining continuity.

 e.         The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home or homes.

 f.          The moral fitness of the parties involved.

 g.         The mental and physical health of the parties involved.

 h.         The home, school, and community record of the child.

 i.          The reasonable preference of the child, if the court deems the child to be of sufficient age to express preference.

j.          The willingness and ability of each of the parents to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing parent-child relationship between the child and the other parent.

k.         Any other factor considered by the court to be relevant to a particular child custody dispute.

 The court has broad discretion in determining which factors are the most important. Lengthy disputes over child custody are very disruptive to all concerned, especially the children.

 The attorneys at Sterling Law Office have almost four decades of combined experience representing individuals in family law matters.  Our attorneys are skilled individuals who know the judges, understand the processes of family court, and will guide you through the system.

 Posted 11/9/10 – Approved by Lea Ann Sterling

The information presented in this article is for general information only and should not be construed as legal advice.

     Sterling Law Office is pleased to announce that since that time, it has fulfilled its commitment and Attorney Wendy K. Bailey has completed the Collaborative Divorce Practice training through the Collaborative Practice Institute of Michigan (CPIM) and is currently accepting collaborative divorce and family law cases. 

     Wendy Bailey is a member of two multi-disciplinary teams of professionals who have been trained specifically in the collaborative style of settlement and conflict resolution in Northern Michigan.  She is a member of the Up North Collaborative Divorce Professionals, which primarily serves Leelanau, Grand Traverse, Antrim, and Benzie Counties.  She is also a member of the Cadillac Area Collaborative Divorce Professionals, which primarily serves Wexford, Missaukee, and Osceola Counties.  If your case is not in one of the above-mentioned counties, please contact our office to determine if we can assist you in the collaborative process or direct you to someone who can.

     For more information on collaborative divorce, visit the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals’ website: www.collaborativepractice.com and visit Collaborative Practice Institute of Michigan’s website: www.collaborativepracticemi.org.  The Up North Collaborative Divorce Professionals team is currently developing a website, which should be functional in the near future at: www.upnorthcollaborativedivorce.com.  Please feel free to read the original collaborative divorce blog entry, posted on 11/2/07.

 Posted 10/1/10

Approved by Lea Ann Sterling

 The information presented in this article is for general information only and should not be construed to be legal advice.

The defining elements of collaborative divorce include:

*It is initiated with an agreement between the parties that commits them to full disclosure of all necessary financial and other information; to respectful, cooperative interactions with a problem-solving focus; to settling out of court without going to trial; and to achieving a result that fits the needs of all individual members of the family, and keeps the well-being of children paramount. A primary goal is to preserve and strengthen children’s relationships with both parents.

*The couple, instead of the Friend of the Court or the judge, work out what their parental responsibilities and schedules, and division of property will be. This allows the couple to keep control of their own destiny. When a divorce is litigated at trial, the couple have no control over what the outcome will be for each, nor for their children.

*In addition to a collaborative law attorney for each spouse, the husband and wife are supported by a team of professionals trained to help them put together the agreements needed for division of assets; for a plan to act as a parenting team and keep the family working together into the future, recognizing that while the marriage may end, if there are children then the family continues and needs to thrive; and to deal with the anger, fear, and other emotions which can, when untreated, turn the divorce process into a bloody battleground. The professionals include a neutral financial consultant; counselors and “coaches” to support creative, productive, effective solutions to issues and emotional hazards; and child therapists and advocates, as needed.

*Even with the added professional consultants, the costs of collaborative divorce run much lower than an adversarial case. Thousands of dollars are saved by eliminating formal discovery procedures, deposition-taking, the filing of motions, and a court trial. This preserves family assets for the resolution of marital debts, and for support and education of children.

*All discussions and interactions to move the divorce settlement forward, or to resolve any problems that arise, are conducted only at scheduled meetings in the presence of both clients and both attorneys. This reduces attorney fees by cutting out time-devouring back and forth between each individual and their attorney, then that attorney to the opposing attorney, to the second client and so forth, whenever an issue occurs. It manages disagreements in a direct, efficient manner, which obviates the common divorce sand trap of “he said/she said.”

Divorce can generate many destructive and volatile emotions, and can be especially damaging to children. Having attorneys, mental health counselors, and coaches working as a team with a couple to handle emotions constructively and not let them derail the dignified negotiation of differences offers a tremendous boon. As well, it can deliver an experience of marital dissolution which will have much less lasting, crippling effects on children. Sterling Law Office family law attorneys are committed to working with divorce clients to explore and implement such innovative, superior means of settling family conflicts.

For further reading on collaborative divorce, try www.divorceconnections.com, an educational law site sponsored by a group of Traverse City, Michigan area professionals, or www.collaborativeattorney.com, where a California law firm has posted articles on the topic from a wide spectrum of sources.
Posted by Mary Wreford; Approved by Lea Ann Sterling, Esq., November 2, 2007

The information presented in this article is for general information only and should not be construed to be legal advice.

1) Outline the family financial situation: make a list of what you own, a list of what you owe, what the family income is and from whence it comes, and the family’s monthly bills/living expenses. Specify who is the named owner or owners on each asset and for each debt (home, cars, credit cards, etc.).

2) Make copies of statements for all accounts your family has, such as bank account, stocks or other investments, pension funds, life insurance and so forth, as well as for income tax returns and any other family financial records.

3) Do an inventory and list all the personal property or assets which belong to you and/or which you would wish to keep if a division of family property occurs.

4) Keep. It. Friendly. If you can keep relations with your partner civil and amicable through the split-up, everyone will win at least a little. Vindictiveness is a poison that will hurt everyone, especially children.

5) Before your first meeting with an attorney, write down all the questions and problems about which you want to ask. As when you go to the doctor, a written list will help you remember important topics during what could be an upsetting discussion. It will help focus the meeting so it takes less time, which saves fees, and it will give the attorney a written document of your priorities that can be kept in your file for future reference. Bring your financial records to your initial meeting for the same reasons – it’s much less expensive for the attorney to get information from you than from financial institutions or from your partner’s attorney.

6) The more negotiating and agreement you work through on your own with your partner, before the divorce proceedings are initiated, the less negotiating your attorney will have to do on your behalf, and again, the more money you will save in fees. When agreement can’t be reached, clearly your attorney will need to step in, but you may be able to resolve some day-to-day matters, for example who pays for car insurance or school fees, or how household goods and furnishings will be divided.

7) Don’t make big-ticket purchases or take on new debt. These items will make your finances harder to sort out if the time comes to divide things, and they could add to the debt load you have to assume at a point when your spending money is decreasing.

8) Make the most educated estimation possible of what it will cost you to live after the divorce, so you know what goals you want to meet in the financial negotiations and the divorce settlement.

9) If you don’t have any credit in your own name, you will need it when you are single again. Start getting a good credit rating by taking out a credit card, department store card or gas card. Use it only to the extent you can pay off in full every month.

This general guide to putting your house in order before a possible divorce will not apply to every situation, nor be right for everyone, but it will help make a good start. Your attorney can assess what actions are best for you to take, and the more organized information you give the attorney, the better that assessment will be.

A lot of informational material on divorce is available on the Internet. Two commercial sites which offer free on-site articles on a plethora of divorce topics are www.divorcemagazine.com and www.womansdivorce.com The .com in a website name means the site is operated as a business, and will be offering products for sale, and as mentioned above, always check with an attorney before taking advice on legal matters. www.grandparentsrights.org is a not-for-profit Oakland County, Michigan organization with information for parents, as well as grandparents, on its site, and for one of my favorite family law office blogs, which is astute and educational, go to www.alabamafamilylawblog.com
Posted by Mary Wreford; Approved by Lea Ann Sterling, August 2, 2007

The information presented in this article is for general information only and should not be construed to be legal advice.